May 24, 2024 at 3:26 am

Daughter Was Rude To Extended Family Because They Were Dirty, So Mom Dismisses Her Feelings And Tells Her To Grow Up

by Matthew Gilligan

Source: Reddit/AITA/Unsplash/@patrikvelich

I’m no therapist, but I think there’s something serious going on under the surface with the teenager you’re going to read about.

And it’s up to you to decide if this mom is handling this situation the wrong way.

Dive in to her story and see what you think.

Get started now!

AITA for dismissing my rude teen daughter’s feelings?

“I’m F45, and my daughter is 18.

Recently, my terminally ill aunt passed away a week after summer break started. (After a few months of her quick deterioration and just a few days of being in hospice because she had no response to treatment.)

My daughter has always been a closed off, reserved person. However, she’s a little immature when she doesn’t get what she wants, and is very snide and in your face sometimes during those occasions.

When my aunt passed away, my sister came over and has been here ever since, for about four weeks now, when we arranged the funeral and reception.

They did have a bond.

My daughter did not cry or look upset at all, even though she’d sometimes go to look after her great aunt on the days her great uncle needed to go out, since she was bed bound and completely paralysed and unable to speak.

You’d expect some sort of reaction, right? But she had none.

She’d avoid her great aunt a lot, and never talked to me about her.

But things have changed.

For this reason, I assumed she was just detached as a lot of children usually are, and left her alone.

However, since her aunt and her three young children came to stay, she has been very bratty, and complains when she has to clean up after them because they’re quite spoiled.

She’s like this every time they come to stay, because my sister is quite an unhygienic person and she and her children have had lice for years.

She didn’t say anything to them since my aunt is grieving, so she hides in her room for the whole day because she feels “stuffy” and “repulsed.”

Always asking me when they will leave. I understand why she feels this way, I don’t like how the children and my sister crowd my home and not clean up after themselves. But they’re family, and we’re grieving even if she’s not.

She thinks her daughter went too far.

She even disliked the reception, not serving the guests (family and family friends.) and looking annoyed when I told her to, as she said she just wanted to “sit there.”

It was very embarrassing for me. All she needed to do was hand out water.

I told her not to be too mean, as they’re family and her aunt is grieving, but she, being immature, narrowed her eyes at me and told me she feels trapped in this house, wanting space, before she went back to her room, even when I ask her to come downstairs and spend time with me.


She’s usually a sweet girl. Very smart and mature, even emotionally, and very perceptive, but for the past few weeks she’s been more reclusive and bratty than usual, even more so than other times when her aunt has been around.

It seems to me, as of recently, there’s been a bad change in her. Even if she doesn’t care about her great aunt dying, someone who has taken care of her before developing this illness and who she has known since she was young, she should at least think of her aunt’s needs.

Honestly, I’m quite annoyed. My mother told me I should just leave her alone to herself, but she needs to be kinder.

Am I right in being dismissive of her attitude and “feelings”?

Check out what Reddit users had to say.

This person said she acted like an *******.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Another Reddit user agreed.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This person shared their thoughts.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Another reader thinks they know what’s going on here…

Source: Reddit/AITA

And this person said she’s kind of an *******.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Yeah, this mom needs to grow some compassion! Jeez!

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