Bad behavior sometimes start young, but should a childhood tantrum be forgiven as the years pass?

When a 7-year-old’s meltdown derailed her cousin’s 20th birthday, it was bound to leave some scars.

Now, a decade later, one cousin thinks it’s time to move on—but the other isn’t so sure.

Check it out!

AITA for telling my cousin to stop holding a grudge over something I did when I was 7?

I (17F) have a cousin, Adrianne (30F), who’s always been seen as the black sheep of our family.

She’s neurodivergent and has a more alternative style. Think bright hair, tattoos, and piercings.

We were never close because of the age gap, but our families wanted to be close knit.

When Adrianne turned 20, her family decided to visit us and celebrate her birthday together.

Here’s the problem: I was 7 at the time and, well, I threw a tantrum.

Ah, 7-year-olds.

I wanted to go to a different restaurant than the one Adrianne had picked, and I made such a fuss that everyone ended up staying home.

Later, when they got a cake for Adrianne, I insisted on blowing out the candles myself, and my parents let me do it because they didn’t want to deal with another meltdown and told Adrianne she was too old to be making a fuss over her birthday anyway.

I honestly don’t remember much from that day, but apparently, it really hurt Adrianne.

No kidding.

She wasn’t even allowed to celebrate with her friends like she wanted because she had to come on that family trip.

Fast forward to now, and I’m applying to colleges, specifically in the state where Adrianne lives.

Over the years, I’ve come to realize just how toxic some of our family dynamics are, and I reached out to Adrianne to apologize for what happened when I was a kid.

I told her that I understand now, and I asked if she could help me navigate things as I apply to schools in her area.

Bold.

Adrianne pretty much brushed me off and told me she’s still upset about what happened on her 20th birthday.

I tried to explain that I was just a kid at the time and that I’m sorry, but she’s holding onto this grudge like it happened yesterday.

I told her she needs to let it go, but she seems really stuck on it.

My parents think she’s being unreasonable, but I’m starting to wonder if I’m being insensitive to her feelings.

So, AITA for telling my cousin to stop holding onto a grudge over something I did when I was 7?

Cake candles are still a sore subject, huh? Wild.

Most people on Reddit are saying she is the one in the wrong.

This person says apologizing and asking for help in the same breath was a jerk move.

This person concurs.

And this person they were always an AH the whole way through.

Welp…

Turns out time doesn’t heal all wounds—especially when birthdays and blown-out candles are involved.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.