September 20, 2024 at 4:49 pm

Mother Insists Her Teen Daughter Share A Room With Her Partner’s Daughter, But She Refuses And Forces Her To Choose Living With Her Dad Full-Time To Avoid Sparking Family Tensions

by Benjamin Cottrell

Source: Canva/dimaberlinphotos, Reddit/AITA

Merging families often means merging lifestyles. But of course, it rarely goes as smoothly as expected.

When a teen’s mother insists she shares a room with her partner’s daughter who she barely knows, the teen makes a big life change to ensure her boundaries are respected.

Read on for all the juicy details.

AITA for moving in with my dad full time after my mom moved in with her partner and his kids?

My mom moved in with her partner of 3 years recently.

They bought a place together and they want to get married.

Before moving I (16f) always shared a room with my sister (10f). And my brother (12m) had his own room.

This blended family has seriously jumbled their current arrangement.

But because my mom’s partner has a 15 year old daughter and his other kids are boys, they didn’t want her in a room with the boys.

So my sister was moved into a room with my brother and I was told her partners daughter and I would be sharing.

I didn’t like that.

She’s upfront with her mom about her preferences, but she’s not receptive to any of her ideas.

I told her I’d rather share with my brother and let my sister share with her partners daughter.

Mom said that was not a good idea.

My brother and sister suggested the three of us could share but mom cited space as the reason that couldn’t happen.

She has good reasoning, so she continues to argue with her mother.

I didn’t want to share a bedroom with someone I’m not close to.

Love my siblings,so no big deal to share with them. Don’t love the 15 year old so it was not something I was cool with.

Her mother tried coming up with excuses, but she found flaws in all of them.

And my mom tried to argue about college but I won’t be going to college. I’m going to do a trade.

And even if I end up with roommates, we’ll have our own spaces.

I told her all this.

So she decided she wouldn’t be living with her mom at all.

I also talked to her about my decision to stay with dad full time.

It was written in their custody order that once we reach 16, we can make that decision if we want to.

My mom didn’t think I was serious.

But she was.

The wakeup call was when I moved nothing into her new house and only stayed for short visits vs overnight visits.

My dad fully supports this.

My mom and her partner aren’t happy.

Her mother’s partner is now concerned the effect this will have on his own kids.

And he’s extra unhappy because his daughter is now the oldest and has no one close in age to hang with during family time.

She’s not that close with her brothers according to my mom and her partner.

But that’s not her problem, the teen argues.

I told them I’m not here to be her entertainment or companion and I’d hang with my siblings anyway, and the age gap is not a problem.

My mom gave me an ultimatum to move in with them and stop living full time with dad.

When I didn’t change my mind, she told me I was acting spoiled and mentioned I had always shared a room.

She’s resolute in her point of view and she’s not changing it.

I said sharing a room was not the issue. But I always shared with siblings, not another random kid.

Mom said it was so entitled to say that and she also cussed my dad out for allowing me to live with him.

She can’t fight it though. It’s in their custody papers.

AITA?

More often than not, ultimatums backfire spectacularly.

What did Reddit have to say?

The adults in this situation were naïve to expect a fully seamless transition.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Parents need to understand that teens aren’t just puppets to be bossed around at will.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This redditor brings up an interesting point.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Her mom wants her to stay, but is it even for the right reasons?

Source: Reddit/AITA

The teen was right to prioritize her comfort over sharing a space she was uneasy about.

In the end, this new living arrangement created more distance than closeness.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.