Having all the things might sound like a good idea, but in the corporate world, just like everywhere else, it usually isn’t.

Just ask an IT guy, like this one.

You’re going to want to check out the lesson he taught his coworker.

All the software? Enjoy a 15 minute start-up time

I work for a large multimillion company, in which software installation and removal demands admin rights.

This is due to a large scale hacker attack, which occurred before my time at the company.

As one of the few IT admins it’s within my responsibility to install and remove software for all computers.

One coworker of mine’s laptop had seen it’s final days and needed to be retired to it’s final resting place of Valhalla like all good warriors do.

Be careful what you wish for.

I got a message from him, that he needed his PC swapped and I said fine, and asked him what kind of software he needed.

He responded that he used everything, so I should install all we could.

Keep in mind that we have software specified for roles within the company and our company is freaking huge.

I send him the whitelisted software list and again ask him “what software do you need buddy?”

He answered that he couldn’t be bothered to look through it and that I should simply install it all.

Okay, my guy.

I popped the back of the poor new Lenovo machine and changed the hard disk.

The original one would not be able to contain the amount of garbage, which was about to flood the gates.

For an entire week I would work on this soon to be cursed machine, which was receiving software installations like orcs coming in at Helms deep.

The outcome seems promising.

I swear I could hear it cry for me to stop, but like a fois gras farmer, I just kept feeding it software.

Here is the kicker: every time I installed anything, if it had the option I would ask it to run at launch.

I probably poured 8 additional hours into this fresh machine, which very quickly worked slower than a Windows Vista machine hooked up to a hamster on a wheel as it’s power supply.

The 1 tb SSD I installed took 15 minutes to boot up every single program, which would open at launch.

The greatest thing was, that he couldn’t undo the start up at launch, because that required admin rights.

To his credit he lasted two weeks before he came back, apologized and asked for me to redo his machine.

We are friends now, but he learned not to mess with the IT guys.

Here is what people are saying.

People ask for things they don’t understand to solve problems they don’t understand.

Wow! That’s a lot.

I hope so. They’re going to get audited by software companies.

It IS weird. Major issues in this company.

IT humor amuses me.

You didn’t have other work requests?

I’m sure all of this was a waste of time.

If you liked this post, check out this story about an employee who got revenge on a co-worker who kept grading their work suspiciously low.