She Kept an Open Door for Her Friend for Years—Until She Asked for the Same Favor and Got Shut Out
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Some friendships run on an unspoken understanding of give and take, but in this story, one woman began to question whether hers has ever actually been balanced.
One city dweller made a habit of hosting a friend in her guest room repeatedly over the years, always for free and often on short notice, without ever making it a big deal.
But when she needed something far more minor in return, just a few hours of wifi access during a work trip to her friend’s city, she was met with vague excuses and a flat no.
She let it go at the time, choosing a co-working space instead of pushing the issue, but now that the same friend is asking to stay again, she can’t help but remain a little bitter.
Keep reading for the full story.
WIBTA if I said no to a friend who asked to stay at my house?
I have a friend that stays at my home whenever she’s in the city.
I live in the biggest city in my state, and she lives in a smaller city that’s about a six hour drive away.
She’s hosted this friend a couple times, but lately her mindset has changed.
She stays in my guest room for a couple of days at a time for free, sometimes with very short notice.
She’s asking to stay again next month, but I’m not so sure anymore because of 1 reason.
2 months ago, I was in her city for work and was staying at a hotel. But the hotel wifi wasn’t fast enough for the work that I needed done, so I asked her if I could stay at her home to use the wifi for an afternoon.
I didn’t even ask to stay overnight since I have a hotel room.
And she wasn’t really buying her friend’s flimsy stories.
She said no because of a few excuses. She said she hasn’t cleaned, which I said I don’t mind and I can just sit in her living room.
Then she said she’s doing something that day at her place.
I just accepted it and took the no for her answer and found a co-working space nearby.
Now WIBTA if I said no to her staying at my place this time around?
It stings when your friend isn’t there for you when you need them.
What did Reddit have to say?
It’s always better to be direct.
This doesn’t sound like much of a friend.
Sometimes a firm “no” just has to be good enough.
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If you enjoyed this post, check out this story about a single person who is dumbfounded when her friends insist couples count as one person when splitting a check.
True friends don’t behave this way.
Hospitality that only flows in one direction isn’t really hospitality, and most Redditors agreed with that fact.
At the end of the day, this woman really didn’t ask for much from her friend. Just a simple place to crash and work for a couple hours.
And considering everything she’s done for this friend, she’s completely justified in feeling bitter. Her friend deserves to be held accountable for not returning a simple favor.
Noticing a reciprocity gap isn’t petty, it’s just paying attention.
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