They Invited Her Mother to Help Plan Their Dream Wedding—Then Executed a Vendor Password Lockdown When She Secretly Altered Their $35,000 Contract
Source: Pexels / Reddit
Most couples don’t seem to realize that making their parents shareholders in their weddings usually all appoints them as de facto planners. “It’s your wedding” all of a sudden becomes passive aggressive when it’s their money on the line.
How would you handle the worst sides of your parents coming to light during your big day? One woman recently complained about her own situation like this on Reddit- to mixed results. Here’s what she said.
My mother: the Momzilla of epic proportions
My fiancé and I got engaged December 2024, planning an October 2026 wedding and have had awful luck with venues.
We finally found our venue in September, but were cutting it close on affording our end.
Then in January, we both lost our jobs within 2 weeks of each other, so sadly we were forced to cancel our venue.
That is wildly unfortunate luck.
My mother offered us 10k for the wedding and paid the deposit on the venue which cost her to lose most of it.
We were distraught about the situation but my mother kept insisting this decision was our “choice” not forced on us.
Despite the lack of empathy she helped us with a new venue for a much smaller wedding and was angry about not being able to invite her 16 friends.
Classic mother of the bride behavior.
My fiance did not want them there from the start, and because she’s angry about the smaller venue, is now saying she’s not bringing my grandmother to the wedding and she doesn’t want to throw me a bridal shower.
At every step involving my mother has been a nightmare and even ruined my dress shopping experience because my bridesmaids were there and she expected me to only include her.
Despite her being extremely rude to everyone that day and guilting me about including my bridesmaids, it was still the best part of wedding planning.
Seems like there may be going on behind closed doors here with Mom…
The latest blow up was when we told her we booked a caterer and her accommodations the weekend of the wedding.
She went nuclear when we told her she wasn’t going to be staying at the Airbnb our wedding party booked saying that we aren’t including her in the wedding.
We needed the wedding party to help set up the reception which she was already included when planning and made that detail clear when changing the venue.
Doubt that detail is going to matter much to her.
She’s now not interested in assisting with planning and threatening not to come to the wedding.
Some background is my parents are divorced and my dad is in very bad health so he’s unable to come, and majority of my family is my mother’s side who she’s now telling not to come to my wedding.
Now it’s looking like the only family I’ll have there is my brother and sister in law and it’s upsetting to think my mother would go this far.
Any sensible person would feel that way.
From the start she’s had this idea of “her place in the wedding” and that the mother of the bride is a “high position” and at every step she’s felt entitled to having more control and argued every decision we’ve made.
My mother and I were not close growing up and had more of an authoritarian presence in my life which she’s now proving to still be true despite being almost 40.
Now that I’m getting married she wants to rush in and act like we’ve always been close when it’s been the total opposite and has made very little effort to spend time with us as a couple.
Parents love making their kids’ weddings about them.
All of a sudden she’s interested in spending time with us only to discuss wedding plans and the 10k in help she offered came with unknown contingencies.
Now that she’s threatening not to come along with telling family the same, I’m deeply hurt but also a little relieved.
That’s not an unreasonable feeling.
My fiance and I just want our wedding to be a joyful experience for all and the relief of her not being there to potentially ruin it is sadly not a concern anymore.
I feel terrible for feeling this way about my mother but I don’t know what else to do at this point.
Seems like what this bride really needs is just someone to vent to. Let’s see if the good people of Reddit were able to provide any consolation.
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The comments were far from sympathetic on this one.
And some stern advice was offered.
One person encouraged the OP to look inward.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a niece who takes down her aunt’s legacy after she steals her entire inheritance.
As well as put the situation into perspective.
But all in all, some necessary tough love was doled out.
You can’t pick your parents, but you can pick your wedding venue…
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