A Woman Is Caught in the Crossfire of an Escalating War Between Her Mother and Her Husband—And She Refuses to Be the Ref
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It’s never easy when your partner doesn’t get along with one of your family members.
And if that person happens to be your mother…
You’re gonna be in for a lot of hard times!
The woman who wrote today’s story is stuck in the middle of mom and her husband…and it’s causing her a lot of grief.
Take a look at what she had to say.
AITA for not inviting my mom to lunch?
“I was diagnosed with breast cancer in June and am currently going through chemo.
My mother moved 5 years ago to live near me as she aged (currently 84). She joins us for lunch every Saturday.
About 4 or 5 weeks ago my mother made a comment that upset my husband. He took her comment as if she said he didn’t want to spend money for my care. He texted her to say that comment upset him. She ignored his text.
This kept getting worse…
Each week my husband became increasingly upset about it and there was growing tension. I reached out to my mom about his text and she felt she did nothing wrong so doesn’t need to do anything now. I asked if it’s better to be right or have peace– she chose being right.
It really hurt me that she valued being right even over the stress it’s causing me to have my husband and mother fighting.
Two weeks ago, while we (me, mother, husband, and children) are sitting at the table she says, I am sorry you misconstrued my comment. I can’t remember what my husband replied but he was upset with this.
My mom immediately got up to leave and both my husband and I made a comment about her leaving not being mature. She turned to my husband and said that it’s bad he’s behaving this way as it hurts me when I need peace at this time.
Uh oh!
To that, my husband said screw you and that she’s not welcome at our house.
Two days later my mom closed a joint bank account we had opened – all her money. She wanted me on the account in case something happened to her and I could use it to pay her rent, etc.
She originally had one with my sister but changed her mind about it and had all the funds in that account transferred to this one. I don’t use the account at all.
A week later he agreed we needed to fix this. He offered to do whatever I wanted.
In his name I texted her apologizing for my (his) part in the fight and asking if we could get together to discuss the situation either at our house, her place, or Starbucks.
She replied “apology accepted. Invite me for lunch. We are family”. He did and she came over for lunch.
Wow, her mom is something else…
We kept the conversation superficial since we didn’t want to have it out there in front of the kids. Before she left she said, peace, peace and then winked at me. I don’t understand that at all.
This past Saturday she didn’t show up. Granted, I didn’t give an explicit invitation but, prior to last week, she never had one.
I’m so tired of this behavior. She’s been doing things like this my whole life and I don’t have the energy for it but I also know she isn’t going to change.
I don’t think she realizes I’m hurt– not my husband– because even now her needs/emotions/self-righteousness is her priority.
Unless I’m wrong here…”
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This person said she’s NTA.
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Another person spoke up.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about two kids trying to earn money by mowing grass, and decide to solve their gas issue by stealing some of dad’s.
And this individual spoke up.
Well, this doesn’t sound like much fun, does it?
Hell no!
We wish her luck…
The drama is strong in this family!
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