She Paid Off Her Boyfriend’s Debt — Then Her Mom Called Her a ‘Thief’ When She Found Out
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Imagine dating someone who is in debt, but you have plenty of money and hardly any bills. Would you let them figure out how to pay off their debt and mind your own business, or would you pay it off for them?
In this story, one young woman is in this situation, and she decides on an impulse to pay off her boyfriend’s debt. She doesn’t think it’s a big deal and thinks it’s a nice thing to do.
Her mom disagrees. In fact, she’s calling her daughter a “thief.”
Is her mom overreacting or did she really do something wrong? Keep reading for all the details.
AITA for paying off my BFs 7k debt with ‘my parent’s money’?
As the title implies, I (21f) paid my BFs (26m) debt, and now my parents (specifically and kinda only my mom) are really unhappy.
So here’s all the context that’s probably needed:
My family lives very comfortably. I wouldn’t say we’re “rich”, like we’re not sharing a tax bracket with bezos, but we’re comfortable and we’ve never really been worried about bills and stuff like some people.
I do have a job that l’ve saved a lot of money from, but my parents also give me a pretty big allowance (most of which enters my savings as well.)
She knows her boyfriend doesn’t make a good first impression.
I’m gonna add this next descriptive part only because I wanna give my mom the benefit of the doubt.
But yes, my boyfriend is not the typical man a parental figure would jump at their daughter dating.
He has a lot of body tattoos. He doesn’t have facial tattoos, but from his neck to his legs it’s pretty much ink. He also has some piercings, and he’s overall a very large and intimidating person.
But wait, there’s more.
Finally, and please don’t judge, but as a teenager, he did face time in prison.
I’m adding these details because I want to be fair to my mom’s perspective, and I can see why someone with those things looks like a red flag.
Those are also her MAIN reasons for disliking him.
She decided to help her boyfriend out.
A little over a week ago I was at my BFs house alone, since he was out at work. I don’t live with him, but I like hanging around his place.
On this day, I opened the door to some people asking about my bf. I’ll sum it up by saying they were debt collectors, but l’m not going to go into the reason for the debt or otherwise.
It was kind of a rash decision, but I decided to cover it. My BF is really sweet, he pays for basically everything for me, he spoils me a lot, and it’s not even a really easy thing for him to do since he doesn’t come from money, and most of the little extra cash he does have is from amateur boxing on the side of his real job.
Since I am comfortable enough to have my schooling, utilities and housing covered, I have a pretty hefty amount saved, so I just did it kinda without thinking.
Let’s see how her mom reacted when she found out.
My parents can see the activity in the shared account I have with them, so my mom called me like only a few hours after, asking what l’d purchased.
And I told her the truth and she’s totally furious at me.
She hates my boyfriend’s guts basically, and she thinks he’s a deadbeat (even though I told her he didn’t make me pay it).
It feels like since yesterday me and her have been arguing NON stop since that day.
She sees her mom’s point.
My dad is mostly neutral even though he hates my BF too.
My mom has been trying to convince him to stop giving me money, and she’s claiming I’m a “little thief”.
I’ll admit I probably only covered like 1k of the debt with my own earned money, the rest was given by them, but a gift is a gift and I feel like I can do what I want with the money they put in my account.
Pls gimme advice. Like I can see why my mom’s mad, I’d be upset about my kids dating a guy like my bf, but I wouldn’t do all this over it.
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She keeps saying that she knows her boyfriend doesn’t look like a guy you’d want your daughter to date, yet she’s still dating him. What does he do for a living? Why was he in debt? Why was he in prison? What are his redeeming qualities? What does she see in him? These are the things I’d want to know.
Let’s see how Reddit responded.
This person thinks she really messed up.
Another person thinks her boyfriend has money.
This person thinks she needs to try living on her own.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman who is annoyed that her brother is making their mom’s international trip all about how broke he is.
Another person points out the real issue.
As far as the last comment, if her parents gave her the money as an allowance, it’s technically her money now, right? So, I wouldn’t really consider that spending someone else’s money.
Maybe her parents should cut her off if she has proven that she can’t be responsible with the money they give her.
She’s old enough to live on her own and support herself. Then, maybe she’d understand the value of a dollar.
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