She Calls Her Father ‘My Dad’ When Talking to Her Mom — Her Mom Thinks It’s Making Her Feel Like an Outsider
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When you’re talking about your parents, how do you refer to them? If you were telling someone about your dad, for example, would you refer to him as “dad” or “my dad”?
Personally, I would say “my dad, ” and that’s also true for the woman who wrote this story. However, in her case, that simple phrasing really made her mom upset.
I think her mom overreacted. Keep reading to see if you agree.
AITA for referring to my dad as ‘my dad’ even when speaking to my mom?
I (29 F) just got into an argument with my mom (60 F) about referring to my dad as ‘my dad’ when speaking to her.
She came by my apartment today to chat, when she walked in I was wrapping my dad’s father’s day gift. She asked what I was doing and I replied ‘I’m wrapping a gift for my dad.’
It was said in a casual, neutral tone but it set her off.
Yikes! Why is she so upset?
She told me I was rude, disrespectful and treating her like an outsider by referring to him in that way. She told me she sent an email to my therapist to speak about this with me as I was clearly going through something and needed help.
I apologized for making her feel that way, asked her to not weaponize my therapist and reminded her I often to refer to my family and friends as ‘my’ even when speaking to people who know them.
Now here’s some context to why this is making me feeling an AH.
This does clear it up a little bit.
My parents were together for 25+ years, BUT my dad never fully matured and often weaponized his incompetence.
My mom grew tired of this and so she stepped out.
This resulted in my paternal family completely cutting her off despite having been in her life since she was 17 (my parents were high school friends.
I feel bad because ik what being cut off feels like and I did not mean to open these old wounds up but also I really do speak like that and did not mean any offense. AITA?
Her mom really overreacted and took her phrasing the wrong way.
Let’s see how Reddit responded.
This person points out a bigger problem.
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Another person agrees that she didn’t do anything wrong.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a brother who doesn’t want to help his sister cover their aging father’s groceries.
Her mother is definitely the problem.
Everyone agrees that her mom messed up.
Who knew the word “my” could create so much drama? Her mom made wild assumptions, and took her daughter’s simple answer way out of context. She definitely needs therapy, but she shouldn’t be talking about her daughter to her daughter’s therapist.
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